As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
The air taste purple.
Randomize
