so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
this hospital has no fireball
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
