brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
high people should be assigned attendants
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
