My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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