i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
