Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
you would pick up someone in the library
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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