You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
