I bet he comes in French.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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