My cat gives me a boner
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize