I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
