So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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