brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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