question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Randomize
