We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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