His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Your cock deserves a montage
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
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