there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
