two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
