what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
