My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize