Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
So vagazzling was a success
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
