well you can't waste a boner
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
