That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Randomize
