Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
