Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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