You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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