Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
