Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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