3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
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