Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
bring money and cleavage
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
