yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize