I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize