People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
