just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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