her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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