it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
