You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
