dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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