i barfeds in our rink
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize