the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just forgot I was standing up.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
