I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
