I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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