It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
