If i come over, it means nothing
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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