I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
