Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My life is pants optional.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
