all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
