If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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