The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
