I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
