i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
